If it's Not To Much Trouble

I work at a military base with not a lot of people. We all seem to get along pretty well. But when something happens here, you seem to be all alone. For example we have this cleaning crew who does a excellent job at making sure everything is nice and clean. I really appreciate them a lot. But during on of there cleanings a not used trash bag was on the floor. That is fine. It happens. But someone was right there next to it with a big printer box moving the printer box to the trash can. He goes and walks right by the trash bag. I go and tell the guy with the printer box that he dropped that and he goes it isn't his it is the janitors. and walks off. Why couldn't he pick it up. I went and picked it up and through it away. Why couldn't he. Why was he so selfish that he couldn't go and pick it up himself. I mean if I could of picked it up then I know he could of. I guess he feels he is better then any one else.

Dark Murky Waters Ahead

I know having a kidney disease is a lot of work. I have a lot of shit on my plate right now and having the time to do it, with the rest I need is very hard. I have a job that has just been taken to days. I have been working swings. 4 to 12. I just started this new shift but I guess I'm having a hard time dealing with the new schedule. I feel over whelmed and not smart enough to handle the day shift. And to make it worst, the big wigs are not in the building this week. so it will be worst next week. I always wanted days to help me get a better understanding of the company and how things work better. But everyday something suppose to happen and not really anything has actually happened. It has been a quiet week. I feel that when something does happen here I won't be able to help or to be given the chance to help because they don't think I can handle it. I want to help real bad, but the monkey on my shoulder is getting me to rethink about this and wishing I was working swings again. I hope the people I work for has faith in myself to fix whatever is broken when I sure don't...

Ups & Downs

How come, everytime you feel everything is going your way and that all the pieces in your life seem to be in place, someone or something brings it back down. For example. Me and my girlfriend have been together for eight years. But ever since I got this job we have been fighting. She spends a lot of time whith her friends while I work and when I get home she isn't home. I thought we were able to figure out a arraingment of some kind as too how to deal with this. I want to see her when I'm home. I don't care what she does when I'm at work unless something needs to be done. As long as we both let each other know what and where we are doing. it is all ok. But recently she has decided to not tell me where she is going and using the excuse that she told me. or just straight out not say anyhthing. When I have to go do something I let her know. She know I go to the gym, I get medicine, I sometime eat out. I will go to my friends work and so on. But twice she has decided not to tell me she was going somewhere after work or even during the day. And one day she told me she was going somewhere only after I asked her if she wanted to go somewhere with me. Am I wrong into thinking that after eight years of doing something that she should be able to do this. I knew she was going to someones house, because she had a DVD by her clothes, but she still could of told me. I tell her. and now I feel sad. Sad that I might not be able to trust her. Why is she hiding. I thought we were doing so much better. I had a great time when we went to Disneyland and she told me she did also. But yet she does this. I'm at a lost of thinking. I don't know what to say or do. I'm going to have to talk to her. and then she will tell me I'm overreacting. I don't think so but she will tell me I am. More to come when I talk to her...

A Little Something...

Hey guys and girls. this will be for anybody who wants to read what I have been doing with my life. As my Friends know I have a Kidney Disease. I received a Kidney Transplant and have been taking a shit load of medicine because of it. I was also blessed with bad bones, Hips to be exact, I have had my left hip replaced twice as well as my right hip drilled. Now my right hip is so far gone that it needs to be replaced but I don't want it done. More on that as I go one with my writings. I'm also a Geek. I love Computers, Computer Games, Microsoft Windows, itunes. and podcasts. I love the Dodgers and also Pokemon. I work at a Military Base as a Computer Operator, it is a fancy name for a Unix/Linux Administrator.